A chicken is an egg’s way of producing more eggs.

A man with one watch knows what time it is.
A man with two watches is never quite sure.

Above all else — sky.

An apple a day makes 365 apples a year.

“There is no spoon.”

“I think not,” said Descartes, and promptly disappeared.

“Mr. Worf, scan that ship.” “Aye Captain. 300 dpi?”

“God is dead.” - Nietzsche.
“Nietzsche is dead.” - God.

“OS/2 is the operating system of the ’90s” - Bill Gates

“Ummm, Trouble with grammar have I! Yes!” -Yoda-

#define QUESTION ((bb) || !(bb)) - Shakespeare.

… All the world’s a stage, and I missed rehearsal.

… Clinton Economics: If 1+2=3 then 4+5=6.

…and on the seventh day, He exited from append mode.

bash: .signature: file not found.

…I’m sorry, Reality is not in service at this time.

…put knot yore trust inn spel chequers.

10 out of 5 doctors feel it’s OK to be schizo!

10.0 times 0.1 is hardly ever 1.0.

1st Law of Thermodynamics: Go to class!!

2 + 2 = 5 for extremely large values of 2.

24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?

43 of all statistics are worthless.

640K ought to be enough for anybody. - Bill Gates, 1981

90 of everything is crud. The remainder is outright sh-t.

A belly button is for salt when you eat celery in bed.

A chicken is an egg’s way of producing more eggs.

A conclusion is simply the place where you got tired of thinking.

A day for firm decisions!!!!! Or is it?

A friend: someone who likes you even after they know you.

A harp is a nude piano.

A little inaccuracy sometimes saves tons of explanation.

A mainframe: The biggest PC peripheral available.

A man needs a good memory after he has lied.

A mind is a terrible thing to … er … hmmmm?

A neat desk is a sign of a sick mind.

A pessimist is never disappointed.

A program without bugs is obsolete.

A seminar on Time Travel will be held two weeks ago.

A Shower is the halfway point between Bed and World.

A yer ago I kudnt spel progremr now I are won.

After all is said and done, usually more is said.

AIBOHPHOBIA - the fear of palindromes.

Air conditioned environment - Do not open Windows.

All E-mail gladly received. Offensive reply ASAP.